I was raised in a christian location, but I

I was raised in a christian location, but I am not personally christian, so if you hear "jesus christ our lord and savior" coming out of the bathroom it is not out of genuine religious devotion but probably because of some fiber-based interaction with the ol' gut flora

if anything, my profound irreligious stance makes this oath much less blasphemous

given my constant idol construction and generally covetous nature it's one of the three commandments I regularly violate

( I don't work on Sundays but let's be honest, I don't work on Saturdays either, not out of a desire to keep my religious bases covered but out of good old fashioned laziness )